Siiiiigh.
Being a stay at home mom is wonderful, and there are perks! Oh I wouldn't give it up for anything - I love being able to hands-on teach my children and see them grow and it makes me feel so proud.
But I'm also lonely. I'm not going to lie! Being at home all day is lonely after a while - I don't really have very many friends, I've realized. And the one good friend I do have is moving in July. What am I going to do? I leave the house to go grocery shopping. Where is the fun in that? I have a few hobbies... but sometimes after days and days of tackling the same dishes and picking up the same clothes off the floor, I feel down.
I'm not saying being at home and cleaning all day long is depressing, but it makes me sad sometimes - like I feel unappreciated, and I feel so.... defeated when the same things happen day after day. The dishes never go away. The laundry never goes away. Like I'm in a continuing cycle, with no breaks. If I take a day off, it's most certainly pointed out to me that I've let things get "gross" in the house... and then I feel bad, like I'm not doing my job!
Sometimes I get sad that I'm picking up someone else's clothes so many times (no matter what I say) that I just stop. Then they pile up. Then someone wants to know where a shirt is. Oh - it's piled under this, this and this. Ok now it's my fault for not finding it and cleaning it for that exact moment. Hello! People - why would you pile clothes 4 feet from your hamper, when the hamper is RIGHT there!!! Not difficult.
I've come to the conclusion that I need a week or two on vacation in Tahiti. Maybe if I start saving now, I can go when I'm 60. Because heaven knows I don't have the money to go any time sooner.
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